Greedy Goblin

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Moron of the week

I simply couldn't stop laughing on this kill. I mean seriously. CCP should scan the database for such losses and the pilots should be instantly moved to highsec in an NPC corp with being unable to enter low/null/WH and joining player corp until he completed the tutorial missions and successfully completed at least a lvl 2 mission. It would help with customer retention.

I also have a nasty idea how could CCP make good money: for a PLEX, remove a loss report from the API. I'm sure he'd gladly pay.

Another serious failure arrived just now!


Steel H. said...

Well, people who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones, and NPC corp hisec bears should tone down the rhetoric. Until they’ve fired a maybe rocket at someone. Perhaps CCP should have moved you to hisec after you jumped into Aunenen in a rail badger and kept you there until… never mind.

Point is, this is a chaotic open PVP game, shit/mistakes/bait/traps happen to everyone. Sure it’s hilarious, you laugh at it and move on. That guy looks like a traveled PvPer and covert recon pilot, and has a long ass killboard behind him. Until you have that, you are just troll #654 marking his territory on the eve-kill thread (nothing wrong with that).

Pretty sure he won’t pay to have that loss removed from his API. That one’s a keeper. Goons are good at self-deprecating and celebrating their hilarious losses. After all, taking yourself too seriously in an internet spaceship game is the main hallmark of a pubie.

Gevlon said...

CCP did not have to move me to highsec after I jumped to Aunenen in a Badger, I did myself because I recognized my inability to PvP. CCP should help those who has the attitude of "ima pwnz0r" while a mining barge beats them.

Gevlon said...

Also, check his "long ass killboard". It's full of capsules, noobships, transport ships, frigates and such. Yes. He is the man!

Out of his 20 kills from Aug, only 2 had firepower.

Anonymous said...

How is sitting in a NPC corp in high-sec going to make him a better pvper?

that's the sort of advice that breeds eternal carebears

Druur Monakh said...

I agree with Steel H.: You are in no position to call this guy a moron, because you simply aren't qualified. This is evidenced by the fact that you only point and laugh, without giving any reasoning.

For all we know, it could have been a neck-to-neck DPS race, with the SB falling just one volley short.

Gevlon said...

@Druur: you don't have to be expert to recognize something so utterly moronic. You don't have to be a chef of a renown restaurant to recognize that a cake with a big warm shit on top is not good.

If he had a DPS race with a MINING BARGE, how did it not qualify him a total failure.

Steel H. said...

Ok, sure, he took on a target bigger than him (that's the mistake by the way), and sure, a Skiff lossmail is hilarious (though less so if you think logically at the last patch notes). Trial and error, he won’t do it again next time (I hope), etc, etc, etc. Point is, I still don’t think a galactic senate committee to rescue this poor capsuleer from his own stupidity is warranted in this case (nor the un-controllability of your laughter from your quarters at Jita 4-4).

But then maybe it’s me. In almost a year of EVE I’ve pretty much seen it all, from dual tanked Brutixes/Myrmidons (hi IRC!), to 20bil shinnies wardecced/Burn Jita(I was there), afk Nyxes lost to sanctum rats, gyrobuses and jump titans... It’s getting hard to concoct an original enough form of stupidiocy to impress me out of my jaded stupor. “Hey guys, look, and idiot fucked up again in an internet spaceship game”…

Druur Monakh said...

@Gevlon, in case you haven't noticed, the mining barges have recently been significantly buffed in their defensive capabilities, whereas the stealth bombers are still tin foil cans. So while the raw DPS output of a Skiff is not much, it's the DPS/EHP ratio which is important here. The PvPers - and in particular the solo PvPers - will have to develop new combat doctrines in order to handle the new mining barges, and the only way that can happen is through trial and error.

In other words: what this pilot attempted (either by accident, ignorance, or intention) was an above-class kill, and he failed. That the target was a mining barge and not a battleship is source for amusement, but doesn't make him a moron per se.

Gevlon said...

@Druur: unless the Skiff had scram and web (which is extremely unlikely), he could any time interrupt the fight, warp to a celestial and cloak. I understand that him failed to kill the Skiff is no shame, but him being killed is.

goodkarma said...

So you think that assault frigates shouldn't count as real kills? Why? They are amazing little ships, capable of taking on far bigger targets.

Also, goonswarm doesn't exactly have a reputation for being overly killboardcentric so he is the wrong target for an option to clean it. (-A- and hisec lolmercs are better targets)

And finally: Stealth bombers die from getting sneezed at. If the skiff was properly baitsetup, the bomber would have been dead the moment it decloaks.

Anonymous said...

skiff is the FotM bait/cyno ship and it will take awhile until everyone is aware of that.

the skiff certainly had a point, probably had a web and maybe a drone damage mod - a stealthbomber dies to drones very fast and can't do anything against them

that doesn't change that the stealthbomber fitting is bad, though.

Felipe Suzin said...

Again you show your lack of experience.

He probably had a scram, a web and a couple neuts in that ship, not to mention a really good tank these days.

The game is baiting. That barge was not mining, it was baiting AFK cloackers.

It's ok that you don't know stuff man, but it's getting old people come here to educate you.

Gevlon said...

@Felipe: Educate me, how many neuts can you fit to a Skiff while having at least one mining beam (to be believable bait)?

Felipe Suzin said...

Sorry, my mistake, it's a skiff, no neuts then.

Still my point stands, one mwd, a scram, even a double web and you still have enough room for a decent tank.

But that's not the main critique at your post from me. The point is: Why are you not celebrating the ingenuity of the other pilot? It's a bit childish what you do. You had no idea of what's going on, never tried something similar, on both ends, must be said, and think you can point and laugh?

Stick with what you know, I never commented in your trade posts, but find them somewhat interesting, every single time that you post something related to PVP you 30 comments saying your wrong.

If you want to learn, I'll teach you... If the price is right of course.

Bobbins said...

from :- You can barely find battles in EVE
'there aren't any battles in EVE. There are only ganks: fights where one side has absolutely no chance to win.'
'Most of the players are lolgankers who just want to experience beating a helpless, chance-less human being.'

Two players believed they were ganking the other. Only one was right!
Good (The skiff) triumphs over evil (the covert ops). I like it.

Bobbins said...

'If you want to learn, I'll teach you... If the price is right of course.'
'Sorry, my mistake, it's a skiff, no neuts then.'

Don't advertise your expert pvp skills after being corrected by someone who you claim knows nothing about pvp. It just looks bad.

Anonymous said...

'advertise your expert pvp skills'

except he didnt know the slot layout of a skiff, a pve ship.

it wasnt his pvp skills that were lacking now was it?

Anonymous said...

Skiffs used to be easy pray for Bombers like that - its no suprise some deaths show up now of people who haven't seen the changes yet.

Anonymous said...

Old kills are boring. You could find oh so many more if you looked.

I mean, 'Moron of the week' does imply it's something recent. But three months? Come on, in that timespan you can probably find that Iteron that shot down an attacker.

Not that I disagree that they obviously messed up, but there is no background info, but the post doesn't meet your own standards. I hope at least.

If you'd at least share why you came to the moron conclusion, the post would perhaps be useful. Did the Skiff have Fighters? As it doesn't have hardpoints, was it only drone damage?

Doing 1300 damage takes a while, how was it done? Propose a potential fit to accomplish it, maybe a bubble trap was involved?

NoizyGamer said...

Why wouldn't the Skiff pilot fit a scram and web if he is in 0.0? He could fit a web, scram, propulsion mod and still have the slots to fit a shield hardener and shield extender. A pilot can get more help if he shouts out "Hey, I have a ship tackled, come get it" than just shout "Help, I'm being attacked!". Or at least, that's what I've been told.

Kristopher said...

Doesn't need neuts on the skiff.

A stealth bomber if fragile ... it is no more tanky than a frigate. This guy added a nanofibre hull, which made it even more fragile.

Cruise torps are big weapons, and are going to do very little damage to something the size of a cruiser, and the Skiff has a tremendous shield tank for a mining barge.

t2 drones are an absolute nightmare for a weak tanked frigate.

Unless the Skiff had a point ( which may happen more often after this kill mail ... heh ), the goon got himself killed by stubbornness.

I'll bet it came down to a race between the cruise torps chipping away slowly on the Skiff, and the drones eating the SB for breakfast.

Kristopher said...

Anon 17:52:

Yep. The shield tank on the new Skiff is incredible. And he probably could have put a point and a web on it without downgrading it much.