Greedy Goblin

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Ultimate power

Do you want ultimate power?
Do you want to have others to be at your mercy?
Do you want to be able to punish, even kill your minions?
Do you want to have access to sex with them any time you want, the way you want?
Do you want to be payed for doing nothing but commanding your flock?
Do you want to feel and be acknowledged by everyone as their rightful Lord?
Do you want them to look upon you as their God, not even thinking about anything but complete obedience?

This is your lucky day! Because here on the Greedy Goblin, the secret of ultimate power are hereby revealed. By following a simple advice, you can reach everything you wished for!

I'm not even charging you for this secret that can change your life from "average Joe" to the possessor of the ultimate power.

Are you ready?

Behold the king of the life, the man who has it all:



Disappointed? Why? I fulfilled all my promises!

The sheep are completely at his mercy.
He can slaughter them anytime for food, skin or whatever.
He can have sex with them anytime.
He is payed for doing it.
No one questions that he has the right to command the flock.
The sheep never-ever question his position. Don't even think about it.

You mean they are not the ones you want to dominate? Well dude, you're out of luck then. Because only sheep will bend to your will. Granted, there are different sheep than pictured. There are ones with only two legs and less fur (hopefully). But they are still equally annoying and useless.

The "social skills" or "networking skills" are the skills that can make you the lord of these two-legged sheep. They will bend to your will, they will come to you, they will invite you to parties, they will have sex with you, they will praise you. You can even take their money (not much, since they don't have much).

Where is the catch? You have to be with them.

Could I increase my reader count if I would write with humiliatio? Of course I could.

I just don't want to. I don't want sheep here. They are way too annoying. Granted, I could get money from advertisements, but I don't need more. I would like to have more, but not so desperately to be nice with sheep.

Here you will find goldmaking tips and goblinish philosophy. If you like it for itself, welcome. If you don't, fine. Your time, your call. After all, you are not a sheep.

Or you prefer being treated as one?


Simple version: getting readers via social tricks is like recruiting with "friendly raiding guild looking for ppl all class /w me for inv". You get numbers, but at the cost of quality.

30 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think now you've officially jumped the sheep.

"He can have sex with them anytime."
-Gevlon

Stick to giving glyph making tips my friend. A sheepherder is NOT ultimate power. Being a dictator where you can kill all your opponents, build lavish statues, have your own personal army, and can get any woman you desire is ult. power.

luv2bdryvin said...

could be mistaken... but I think the post was:

Power in itself isn't a enviable thing... what form your power takes, and who (what) its over it what matters.

Thus, Gevlon doesn't want power over sheep who can't read an article and figure out what its saying. He wants power over people like me... who are smart, can read, and rarely troll with lame comments about sex with sheep.

Larísa said...

Funny enough you're doing exactly what you're claiming that you don't want to do in this post.

You're flattering your audience, praising their intelligence. "Delectare", as they called it the old days.'

You're a sheepherder just like any other blogger, Gevlon, either you like it or not.

spinksville said...

Sheep aren't useless! They provide useful wool, lambs, and meat :P

Sven said...

Ah, but who are the sheep?

The "friendly social ppl" who dare question their goblin overlord, or the Randians who hang on his every word?

Anonymous said...

Do sheep mounts come with a repair bot and a vendor?

Lance said...

Sheepz with AH skillz!

Entertaining as ever Gevlon. I am always enjoying it whether I agree with ya or not.

mute said...

Good day Sir,

You are being "sheep"ed by various big companies and governments of the world - not to mention the invisible pressure of community on you in daily life.

Have a nice day Sir.

Anonymous said...

WAY YEAH I am now going out to hump some sheeps ^_^ That makes me feel powerfull. Oh.. wait... that sounds a bit odd....

Gevlon said...

@Larísa: I'm not calling my existing readers intelligent (EDIT: read as "all of them"). I want to shape this site to attract intelligent ones and repel sheep.

Lot of the readers are intelligent. But - if you read anonymous comments - you can see that I'm pretty far from my goal :-)

Wooly said...

When you advertise your site as a blog with tips for making gold, then you don't even need any social tricks. That alone is enough to attract the widest variety of people you can imagine. You bring for free what most wow-site adds are trying to sell. The fact that comments here don't look like you're watching an average Thottbot page is already quite an achievement. So good luck keeping M&S out, no psychological trick in the world will pull that off.

Joe said...

If i were to compare this websites enertaining and informative gossip to good grazing, intelligent "sheep" would be attracted here, unfortunately there are those sheep that follow the flock as well. Essentailly there will always be bad apples in the group of readers. I just wonder if the "anonymous's" realise they are in that minority/majority...

Either way, I enjoy your blog, and find it a daily entertaining insight into the world of a goblin, above everything else.

Anonymous said...

Gevlon,

Please go back to gold making tips.
This last one with the sheep is disturbing.

highlatencylife said...

Yes I want a legion of sheep to do my bidding Muhahaah.

As for Gevlon, your site is top notch. You've helped me acquire the things I want to acquire in game.

If I only could apply goblinism in real life, I'd be driving a nicer car.

Yazilliclick said...

@wooly

It may attract all sorts however the content doesn't keep them. Recently on a forum somebody was asking for copies of wow gold guides, I instead linked them to this site and a couple other blogs that really contain the information you need. Their response is that they can't understand it, it's too hard/takes too much time and won't go back.

Some people just want to find step 1,2,3,4 to make profit that they can follow exactly and every detail is explained with nothing for them to figure out. Some are wanting to go a bit deeper and learn and that's what I think a site like this covers. At least when it's not rambling off on some side track :P

Anonymous said...

Yep, Larísa hit is spot on..

Gelvon just has a different flock of sheep here, whatever he might call them. But they are still sheep. But Gelvon is a sheep of Blizzard, as long as he's paying his monthly fee, and is likely a sheep to someone else.

Of course deep down he realizes this, or he has really deluded himself with his success in a video game.

Tonus said...

Sheep are people who follow mindlessly and claim agreement even when they do not agree or do not understand what is being discussed. Having people who follow your blog doesn't make them all sheep, it is their attitudes and mindset that make them sheep.

Besides, everyone knows that only ninjas have ultimate power.

Orgauth said...

"Sheep are people who follow mindlessly and claim agreement even when they do not agree or do not understand what is being discussed."

That sounds disturbingly like the large segment of the American electorate that bleat "Yes We Can!" and "Change You Can Believe In", and lawmakers that pass enormous bills without reading them.

Neil said...

There's more to a failure story than just humiliating yourself.

Do you remember when you described how you downed Steelbreaker?

You talked about all the different glyphs and strategies you used that failed, and then about the one you used that succeeded. THAT is the best way to get through to people - to show them not just failure, not just success, but both!

Same with your goblinish market methods. You've shared stories of your successful methods and your failed methods. This gives the reader a complete understanding of the market, of what works AND what doesn't.

What I'm trying to say here is that sharing failure stories is not just a social trick to make people like you - it's a crucial part of teaching others.

For example, I would never have thought about changing my resto druid glyphs between attempts on a boss, but because you discussed it, now I know I'll bring many spare glyphs to my next raid.

You've read Ayn Rand's books. If Howard Roark had done nothing but succeed succeed succeed for the entire Fountainhead, would the story still be as compelling? If you hadn't seen both the success and the failures of Dagny Taggart, Hank Rearden, etc, would Atlas Shrugged still be as interesting? Would those books have made their points equally well if they were pure success stories?

Sydera said...

As usual, you have completely and totally missed the point. Why don't you try actually reading and understanding other people's work (like Larisa's, for example) on its own terms? You interpret everything in terms of your own framework. It seems to be a serious flaw to me. I don't think it's your command of English either--I think it's the way you read.

And, on failure--stories of failure are a classic pedagogical technique. I use them in my classroom to give students a model for overcoming difficulties. Stories of failure-then-success highlight the process of learning, which is really what a professor wants a student to absorb.

Wooly said...

@Neil
Very good point

@highlatencylife
Yes, I guess I know those people too. Tried to help a few of them out. Ended up just redirecting them to lake wintergrasp to grind the revenants in offhours, they were very happy. Me too, as I got eternals for a good price. There are indeed a lot of people for whom the concept of using craftskills and market analysis to make money is a bit too challenging, maybe even boring.

Then I guess they will stay away even without Gevlon doing rants like this :)

Unless you want the absolute top, Gevlon, but I guess they won't need your teachings.

Axel said...

haha,
the "you can have sex with them" part crack'd me up, haha xD

Gibbiex said...

I like the post, and i'm the guy who usually rags on Gevlon.

Wooly Ones said...

Munch munch munch...not a baaaaaaad post, Gevlon.

Tonus said...

@Orgauth: I feel that politics and religion are two areas where most people tend to act like sheep. Even people who otherwise are pretty well adjusted tend to fall in line when those factors are at play.

Hatch said...

"Humiliatio" isn't a suggestion to build a readership. It's a suggestion for getting people to listen to you so you can convince them of something, or to get them to identify with you so they are more likely to believe you/be convinced. Frankly, the idea is that you're more likely to convince M&S to stop being M&S

I know convincing M&S isnt' your goal, what I'm saying is that you were attacking a straw man here, since the idea of revealing your own human failures is more about convincing people and letting them see you in a more real light, and less a cynical play for blog readership that you claim it is.

Also, failure stories are often funnier than success stories, especially if the writer is good.

Orgalia said...

Dont be a sheep, be an intelligent, critical thinking, unique human individual. Otherwise you are like cattle or a sheep and follow the crowd.

Kyev said...

You sir, are a shining beacon of Objectivism and classical liberal economic thought within the greater WoW universe.

I salute you.

Anonymous said...

Larisa hit it right on the money.

"Most people following blogs are just sheep that are easily manipulated, however if you're following *my* blog, it must be because you're an intelligent, thoughtful individual, because mindless sheep are repelled by my abrasive nature"

All that ensures is that you've got a following of masochistic sheep ;)

Anonymous said...

@Gevlon: it's the ultimate goal of rhetorics to stimulate people to think they are above it, so that being less aware of it, they are most easily influenced.

Numbers I can't find again right now say that buying behaviour is most influenced in consumers who think advertising has no impact on them.

Everyone "has ape-subroutines". If you think you or your readers don't, you're not watching them, and don't control them as much as you could.