Greedy Goblin

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Goblinish PuG rules

I've read another sad healer post with the usual stuff: DPS-ers are not running back but AFK until resurrection (and beyond), damage low and make the tank and the healer go to the stone. The blogs are full of "sad healer" or "sad tank" posts, sometimes with "sad good DPS-er" posts.

I'll be rude as always, and it's not even a philosophy post, since these are not opinions but hard facts.

Everyone need instances for gear and rep. You want a successful run, anything else is waste of repair money, time and not fun.

The easiest way to complete an instance is being boosted for free. You get those "plx boost me in WC :DDD" annoyances all the time aren't you? Well, after lvl 80, the same activity is no longer called boosting. These wannabe-boosted leeches will attempt to get into your PuG to get a free ride to epics and badges.

Rule No1: STOP blaming them! They are doing what's best for them, getting blues, epics and badges with little to no effort.

Rule No2: Repeat after me: No one will save me from these leeches, not Blizzard, not the "community", not the tooth faery. It's my and only my responsibility to defend myself from them.

Rule No3: Repeat after me: They want to abuse me, forcing me to boost them! They want to waste my time, waste my repair money. I have absolutely no reason to be nice, understanding or friendly with them.

Rule No4: Never ever go to an instance without checking all members' armory page.

Rule No5: On the armory seek signs of stupidity and not gear level. Everyone was undergeared once, and everyone deserve a chance except dumb ones. The dumb signs:
  • empty gem sockets: No go, no excuses. This is plain lazyness.
  • More than 3 enchants missing: No go, no excuses. This is plain lazyness. If he planned to replace the item soon, still could get a 1-2G LW armor kit or something.
  • Very low stats like less than 1000 spell power or such: no go. This is not being beginner. Reputation and quest blues give more. This is being completely careless noob.
  • Low stats, purples and greens, no blues: he is the boosted version of the previous.
  • Unbalanced stats. 35K HP and 20% avoidance for a tank is worse than 28K HP and 20% avoidance. The latter is a beginner, he will listen to reason and use CC. The former is an idiot who have no idea how to gear a tank, will AoE the whole instance and yell the healer after the inevitable.
Rule No6: bring the player, not the class. Rather have 2 good tanks, 2 good healers, or 3 good mages in a PuG than 1 crappy player of a good class. Bad players are no go, no exceptions, even if there is no run at all. It's better to go daily than wipe 10x because of a moron.

Rule No7: Everyone accepts summon. Those who say, "plz wait until I finish this or that quest" are immediate kick. The only exception if he was not on LFG, you asked him to join because you lacked 1 player. This case he does you a favor therefore you shall wait for him.

Rule No8: Damage assesment before the first boss, before you get saved. Any DPS below the tank: immediate kick. The only exception is if the tank is doing above 1500 DPS and the DPS-er had heavy CC job. Anyone below 1000DPS are out, there is no excuse for that. My lvl 73 does more.

Rule No9: If such useless noob is spotted and the group leader refuses to kick him: immediate leaving group, and whisper the others to leave to and form a new group.

Rule No10: If you violate any of the rules above, you deserve your fate and shall not whine!

9 comments:

EffroTool said...

There are 10 rules there... or did you actually plan to have two rules No5, in that case which to follow? ;)

As for current rules:
5b. Bringing the player not class. Sure if you know the people, but if you know them is it still a PuG? Or rather a premade one. Othere then following rule 5a, you have no other way to judge the player.
6. Can pass on this one if before inviting or during the filling of the group one says he's going to finish quest/some business/BG. But after the whole group is ready and we still wait another 5 minutes for him to accept the summon it's just a kick.
7. with the current AoE type of dungeon clearing I think pala tanks can kinda hit high on dps when fighting some undeads (Stratolme?). So probably could find here quite a few exceptions.

Too bad I'm too good hearted person to be able to follow most of those rules, as I usually tend to give people a chance. Though I did it once in my lifetime. In some raid where one guy was ninja pulling, calling for heals so kinda lot of things to make a raid turn into a horror. Kicked him, after that raid told me why did I kick him and said to reinvite him... well sure if you like it this way. Me or him. Left the damn pug... 2 minutes later it was over. Guess that's what happens when bad player stays and good one leaves in a crappy pug. Gogo rule No8.

Gevlon said...

numbering fixed

From the gear you can judge the player somewhat. So if I have to decide between a Naxx geared second healer and a green rouge, I take the second healer.

7: that exception is there "if the tank damages more than 1500". However if there is AoE tanking, AoE DPS is available. There is not a palatank in the world who should outdamage an Arcane explosion spamming mage or Volley spamming hunter.

EffroTool said...

Probably right with this healer thing. Before they changed the spellpower for healers I wouldn't even consider this, but this days healers can also dps quite a bit... which is kinda what I do most of instances on mobs clearing. Mobs dead faster means less healing needed and shorter run.

Perhaps one day I will try to go with few tanks, could be interesting experience. Though would probably get few angry whispers from people on LFG, for going to instance with 2 or more tanks, while they've been looking for one for hours :D

Anonymous said...

I have been having issues with some heroic groups and I will tell you that your post help out.

I may not do all of them, but I will be damn sure do to most of them. Especially if its the daily.

good read

LarĂ­sa said...

Our brains seem to be a bit attuned. I just wrote a post about putting gear demands on PUGs, will come on friday.

I don't think I'll ever bother to look up all pug members on armory in advance, not for a short pug like UK at least. If I'd raid with them or go for achievements I'd be more careful though.

Your rules are tough but I think it makes sense, even though I'm personally more softhearted.

Unknown said...

I think I posted about doing Heroics while being picky who goes on my team a month ago when I just hit lvl 80.

It was different when all 5 of us were in Sunwell gear getting owned in the face on lvl 80 Heroics. Back then we knew our gear limitations but we know everyone on the team are good players.

Eventually players from my team started to pass on heroics. That's where we started to get PUGS.

We would check their stats before sending out an invite.

Better gear will compensate for some player skill which allows more room for error.

All this check was to avoid wasting time and gold. Another big factor was the moral of the team.

When I start doing heroics on my alt I wouldn't just go in there w/o proper gear as I know first hand the frustration it will bring to the rest of the party.

Anonymous said...

>Rule No7: Everyone accepts summon. Those who say, "plz wait until I finish this or that quest" are immediate kick. The only exception if he was not on LFG, you asked him to join because you lacked 1 player. This case he does you a favor therefore you shall wait for him.

I'd also argue if someone offered to respec wait patiently. Or if they are just buying water or more reagents.

Anonymous said...

Current AOE tanking makes it very hard to surpass pala/dk tanks if you arent a class that can do good aoe yourself ( rogues for example ).

I mostly agree with the gear checks before etc, but if you kick ppl after like you say you do, then I think you gonna end up having a lot of heroics not finished :)

I dont think best use of time to gear up an alt is to go deep into professions and stuff, best way to do it is being very nice to your friends have them boost you a heroic or 10 and after and after that you are probably ready to do pug heroics !

Anonymous said...

Before you sign up for anything in LFG you better already have water and reagents.

When you click that button it means you are ready to roll at a moments notice.

Missing the call due to combat is ok and everybody can see your status bars change so they know this.